Big dream.

I got the call this week to do something I’ve been wanting to do for a long, long, long time. I’ve dreamed about it, planned for it, imagined it, tasted it, smelled it; you get the picture. If you are a baseball fan it’s like being in the minors for years and suddenly, unexpectedly getting the call to play in the majors. The big show. The big league. Big time.

I got the call. Then I panicked.

I’m not ready. They can’t possibly want me to do this. I don’t know enough. It’s going to be too hard. I’ll probably, possibly, very likely make a bunch of mistakes. It might be a disaster. I can’t. I should not accept this. I should say no. I should stay where I am and just keep dreaming. Not doing.

I got the call. I panicked. I paused.

But this is one of my dreams. It’s an odd dream that no one else may really understand but it’s been one of my dreams nonetheless. And I’ve been dreaming of this for a long time. Isn’t it time to stop dreaming? Isn’t it time to start doing? I finally got the call and now I’m going to back out? Run away? Well, maybe…

But what if I’m really bad at it? What if I mess it up, big time. I get to the big show and I mess it up in a really big way. What if?

I got the call. I panicked. I paused. I thought a bit more. I decided.

If I were my own best friend, and I had a dream, and I got a chance to realize that dream, I would tell myself to go for it. Do. Don’t just dream the dream, do the dream.

Even if you don’t feel ready (you’ll never feel ready). Even if you make a bunch of mistakes (because you probably will). Even if you don’t quite know what you’re doing despite years of dreaming and practicing and preparing (it’s okay, you’ll learn). Even if you’re scared (it probably means you care).

I got the call. I panicked. I paused. I thought. I decided. And now, I am going to do.