There are many times in life when we have to draw a proverbial “line in the sand.” We have to make choices. And sometimes those choices are not clear cut. A clear choice might be coffee or tea. Milk or dark chocolate. Blue jacket or brown sweater. Dinner now or after the kids go to bed. Candidate A or candidate B. White or black. Chocolate frosted donut or lemon cream puff. I like those decisions.
But then there are the choices that are less clear. Where all the options are some variation on grey and the what is right and what is wrong does not matter as much as how you feel. And right now, I find myself spending a lot of time deciding between calm, rational thought or anxiety/fear. The line is not clear, it’s a little fuzzy and it seems to shift moment by moment or thought by thought. Read something on the news – veering towards anxiety. Hear something grounded in science – back into rational thought. Thinking about my kids and what is best for them – whooshhh off we go to anxiety land. Explaining to my kids what is best for them for right now – calm (of course, ha). Being my professional self – rational thought. Personal self… I would love to say rational thought, but the reality is 50-50. The line is fuzzy and warped and moves like sand when it is blown by the wind.
So right now, if I were my own best friend, I would remind myself to be gentle with myself. Accept that I might have moments of anxiety and fear but that is not where I have chosen to draw my line. I have chosen calm and rational and cautious. Acknowledge fear and anxiety. Give them a hug. Then jump back on to the rational side of my line in the sand and go surfing, sun bathe, read a book, or build a sand castle.