I was talking with a friend this week about how hard it can be to leave something. To walk away. To give notice. To move towards something else.
It got me thinking about what makes it harder to leave (and what makes it easier). Which led me down the path of thinking about “what could be.”
What could be.
Sometimes it is hard to walk away because the possibility of “what could be” keeps you there. The chance there might be something great just around the corner. The gauzy outlines of something good that just hasn’t fully formed yet. The fear of missing out on something great, if you leave.
Sometimes it is easy to walk away because the possibility of “what could be” is clearer on the other side. The potential is laid out. Something great is not just around the corner, it’s already there. The outline of something good is fully formed. The possibility of what-is (not what-if) compels you to go.
Then, sometimes, both directions are a bit fuzzy. There’s possibility if you stay. There’s potential if you go. But neither is clearly mapped or shining brighter than the other. So, what do you do?
If I were my own best friend, faced with a decision about whether to stay or go, I would remind myself to focus on what I can control. Not the fuzzy possibilities. Not the unclear map. Simply, my feelings, my responses, my actions. If both options are equally grey (neither black or white), then go with my gut. Which situation gets me closer to feeling the way I want to feel each day? Which choice gets me closer to being the person I am meant to be? Which choice allows me to leave my mark in the way I want to leave it on this tiny blue planet? Which choice fills me, and those I love, with more joy?